In Memory of Ella

December 13, 2008



A Child of Mine

"I'll lend you for a little while
A child of mine", He said .
"For you to love while she lives
And to mourn for when she's dead.

"It may be for 6 or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three.
But will you till I call for her
Take care of her for me?

"I cannot promise she will stay
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn.

"I've looked the whole world over
In my search for teachers true.
And from the throngs, the crowd, life's lanes
I've selected you.

"So will you give her all your love
Nor count the labor vain?
Nor hate me when I come to call
To take her home again?"

I thought I heard them say,
"Yea, Lord, thy will be done.
For all the joy this child will bring
The risk of grief we'll run.

"We'll shelter her with tenderness
And love her while we may
And for the happiness she brings
Forever grateful stay.

"And should the angels call for her
Much sooner than we planned,
We'll bear the bitter grief that comes
And try to understand".

"I'll lend you for a little while
A child of mine" He said.
"For you to love while she lives
And to mourn for when she's dead".

-Author Unknown

Ella, your family will forever love and remember you, and look forward to the day you will meet again.

New Year Wishes for Bereaved Parents

To the newly bereaved: We wish you patience - patience with yourselves in the painful weeks, months, even years ahead.

To the bereaved sibling: We wish you and your parents a new understanding of each others needs and the beginnings of good communication.

To those who are single parents: We wish you the inner resources we know you will need to cope, often alone with your loss.

To those experiencing marital difficulties after the death of your child: We wish you a special willingness and ability to communicate with each other.

To those of you who have experienced the death of more than one child: We wish you the endurance you will need to fight your way back to a meaningful life once again.

To those of you who have experienced the death of an only child or all of your children: We offer you our eternal gratitude for serving as such inspiration to the rest of us.

To those of you who are plagued with guilt: We wish you the reassurances that you did the very best you could under the circumstances, and that your child knew that.

To those of you who are deeply depressed: We wish you the first steps out of the "Valley of the Shadow".

To all fathers and those of you unable to cry: We wish you healing tears and the ability to express your grief.

To those of you who are exhausted from grieving: We wish you the strength to face just one more hour, just one more day.

To all others with special needs we have not mentioned: We wish you the understanding you need and the assurance that you are loved.

-from a speech by former TCF President, Joe Rousseau

Christmas in Heaven

I see the countless CHRISTMAS TREES around the world below
with tiny lights like HEAVEN’S STARS reflecting on the snow.

The sight is so SPECTACULAR please wipe away that tear
for I am spending CHRISTMAS WITH JESUS CHRIST this year.

I hear the many CHRISTMAS SONGS that people hold so dear
but the SOUND OF MUSIC can't compare with the CHRISTMAS CHOIR up here.

I have no words to tell you of the JOY their voices bring
for it is beyond description to HEAR THE ANGELS SING.

I know HOW MUCH YOU MISS ME, I see the pain inside your heart
for I am spending CHRISTMAS WITH JESUS CHRIST this year.

I can't tell you of the SPLENDOR or the PEACE here in this place
Can you just imagine CHRISTMAS WITH OUR SAVIOR face to face

I'll ask him to LIFT YOUR SPIRIT as I tell him of your love
so then PRAY FOR ONE ANOTHER as you lift your eyes above.

Please let your HEARTS BE JOYFUL and let your SPIRIT SING
for I am spending CHRISTMAS IN HEAVEN and I’m walking WITH THE KING.

-Wanda Bencke

Beaded Angel Ornament

You can make one in memory of any loved one passed.

Holiday Remembering

Ideas to Remember Your Baby During the Holidays

- Light candle at a set time every evening to remember you beloved child, sibling, or grandchild.
- Volunteer to help others once per week in remembrance of your child.
- Meditate or pray for all the families experiencing the death of a child each day this month.
- Create a loss journal of every "remembrance activity" you participate in.
- Create a work of art such as a clay project, video, scrapbook, or musical composition.
- Write ten letters or cards of gratitude to those someones special in your life.
- Devote yourself to reading one meaningful book during this month about love, life, and loss.

Taken from www.missfoundation.org.

Where Are You Christmas?

This song touches my heart every Christmas. I have always loved Christmas, but just couldn't get into the spirit of it the year we lost Olivia. Then I heard this song. It didn't magically make me feel better and make my Christmas perfect, but it did remind me that it's okay to be sad and grieve. There will be many more Christmas' to come, and though she is not there in person Olivia will always be there is spirit. Since then she has become my Christmas spirit. The last verse of the song may not apply now, but I could cling to the hope it inspires that one day it will apply - that one day I will be healed in a way that I am able to be happy knowing she is safe and sound and having a wonderful Christmas right along with us. What a gift a child is, and who better to know this than someone who has lost theirs. Who better knows of the pain our Heavenly Father experienced when He gave His Only Begotten. In time Christmas will take on this new meaning for those who have lost children, and they will see Christmas in a way they never thought they could. When you are ready, and if you let it, you will one day see the gift that Christmas really represents, be filled with the hope of it, and be able to hold your child in your heart with joy.

Christmas Box Ceremony

The Christmas Box Angel Statue was introduced to the world in the book The Christmas Box, a worldwide bestseller and hit television movie by author Richard Paul Evans. In the book, a woman mourns the loss of her child at the base of an angel monument. Though the story is mostly fiction, the angel monument once existed but is speculated to have been destroyed. The new angel statue was commissioned by Richard Paul Evans, in response to reports that grieving parents were seeking out the angel as a place to grieve and heal. The monument was dedicated on December 6, 1994-corresponding with the date of the child’s death in The Christmas Box (Coincidentally, Dec. 6th is celebrated in many parts of the world as Children’s Day). At the request of Sexton Paul Byron and Salt Lake City Mayor Deedee Corradini, Salt Lake City donated the land on which the monument stands. The sculpture is the creation of a father and son from Salt Lake City, Utah, Ortho and Jared Fairbanks, and modeled according to the description in Evans’ book. The face of the angel is that of Evans’ second daughter, Allyson-Danica. If you look closely you can find on the angel’s right wing (west) the word "hope."Flowers, sent from around the world, adorn the base of the monument year round, accompanying notes left by parents for their "little angels." On December 6th of each year (7 p.m. MST) a candlelight healing ceremony is held at the base of the Christmas Box Angel monument. After a few remarks, a moment of silence, and the lullaby of a children’s choir, the attendees are invited to leave a white flower at the base of the angel statue. The public is welcome.

In addition to the angel in the Salt Lake City cemetery, there are Christmas Box Angels in more than 25 other areas erected by great people just like you. Furthermore, there are nearly 100 in the works, and at least a dozen of these have dedication dates. Click here to locate a Christmas Box Angel near you.

In Memory of Aidan

November 8, 2008



Mommy I'm Here

Mommy I know this day wasn't what you had planned,
But I'm right here beside you, holding your hand.
My spirit has already gone, there's so much work to do,
But our Father let me come today so I could comfort you.
I know you and Daddy love me, and it's hard to see me go,
But that is why we're sent to earth, so we can learn and grow.
I wish I could stay with you here and play with my brother too,
But for now I'll have to wait until your missions are though.
I'll be near when you need me to wipe away your tears,
to hold you tight and kiss your cheeks and chase away your fears.
And on the day our Father calls you to come home
I'll be right there to get you, you'll never be alone.

-Deanne Taylor

Aidan, you will be forever loved and forever missed.

Time

"Time didn't heal, it numbed. Like a good anesthetic, it made the pain more bearable but it never went away." -C. Kelly

An Angel Hug

Angels are ever all around us,
And with love they do surround us.
When my heart is sore in need,
The angels come, my soul to feed.
They come to me from up above,
And sing in whispers of love.
When in my heart I feel a tug,
I know that it's an angel's hug.

-Unknown